Miscellaneous Haiku

stringer hurt his hand
he can’t play on friday night
cindy will be sad

no need to question
these are not the droids you seek
move along now, you

yummy cookie dough
gooey goodness in my mouth
dancing on my tongue

see the puck flying
ouch! it hit me in the eye
vial wants me now

how now, big brown cow!
chocolate milk comes out of you!
well… i wish it did.

fucking blog from hell!
why do you look like such shit?
delete you i might

colorful skittles
rainbow flavors make me high
dude, i need a fix!

say what, big brown cow?
you can’t make chocolate candy?
not liking you now.

hellspawned vehicle
trapping me with metal arms
satan would be proud

stinky cat litter
you might need to move outside
make me hold my nose

bleh bleh blehbleh bleh
bleh bleh bleh blehblehbleh bleh
bleh. bleh bleh bleh bleh.

chocolate is my bitch
always gives me the big “O”
men could learn from her

my body, my soul
self image slowly destroyed
thank god for oprah!

carolina wind,
why the hell will you not blow?
sweating my ass off!

blistering breeze blows
desert wind on angry face
slay bad mechanic

feel myself boiling
feverish, anxious, sweating
control slipping… gone

blurry street signs make
me turn perpendicular
I don’t think that’s right…

middle of the road
stupid whore honking at me
can’t see the road, bitch!

think i’ll take a swim
in the walmart parking lot
no license needed


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