Bathroom Curtains

Crappy (pun intended) bathroom curtains.

Everytime I make a visit to the executive cubicle in the elimination oasis (that’s the handicap stall in the crapper), this is what I see. Looks like someone thinks all the ladies at work are horny lesbians thirsting for an unimpeded ogle at a bare naked va-jay-jay. Better cover your lady parts! If a lesbian gets a clear view of your nether jungle you’re sure to succumb to her homoerotic wiles! Hey, I wrote a haiku about your homophobia, dumbass!

peeking through my stall
if you see you might make me
want to lick carpet

Wait… maybe the decorator in question isn’t afraid of lesbians. Maybe she has a super-powered snatch. Maybe she’s worried someone will find out that a radioactive spider bit her down there (what was she doing naked in a roomful of experimental spiders?) and gifted her with the ability to shoot sticky, spider spooge from her lady cave! Ewwww! Keep those curtains closed, you webbed wacko! Haiku rewrite!

bug done bit my bush
maybe i’ll catch a manwhore
in my nether webs

I never take down the curtains. I’m not sure what that means.


One Response to Bathroom Curtains

  1. robinaltman says:

    The decorator in question needs to be killed. Lie in wait and kill her. Please.

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