Fuhgedaboudit!

I’d just like to say that every time I think of something I want to talk about, by the time I get around to coming here I’ve totally forgotten the amazing, hilarious, life-changing topic I wanted to share with the blogiverse. It’s kind of like the Gingko I forget to take every morning. I see it on the kitchen counter every night before I go to bed, and I tell myself, “Ok. I’ll remember to take that shit tomorrow morning.” And every morning I forget to take the one thing that might help me remember all that important stuff – like my name, where I work, putting on clothes before I leave the house, etc.

Getting old sucks.

Oh, and speaking of getting old, I have discovered a HUGE fabrication that older women have been perpetuating for all of eternity. Your fucking period does NOT get lighter, less painful, or better when you’re going through “The Change.” It gets worse. And heavier. And the cramps feel like diarrhea cramps to the tenth power… times infinity. And speaking of diarrhea… nevermind. I’ve said more than enough.

I’m just looking forward to continuing the legacy of lies.

Advertisements

4 Responses to Fuhgedaboudit!

  1. robinaltman says:

    For the record, I have never told a younger woman that terrible lie. You must be hanging out sociopathic older women.

  2. I knew there was something off about those old broads.

  3. nursemyra says:

    Can’t you take the Gingko at night?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: